How to Get Lint Off a Shirt

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There I was half an hour before my interview standing in my apartment complex laundry room with my only dress shirt covered in lint. Towels in a dryer shed like Siamese cats and unfortunately I had mixed a couple in the load with my shirt. There was not enough time to rewash my shirt and make my interview so now how do you remove lint from a shirt?

Back in 1956, a man named Nick McKay came up with a great idea resembling a cardboard tube wrapped in tape and thus the lint roller was invented. Now I know I have a lint roller in my house and upon checking my bedroom, kitchen and bathroom the closest item I could find was a rolling pin. I also found another towel that needed washing but instead of throwing it in the laundry bin, I deposited the towel under my bed, which is where I found the roller pin. Don't ask why it was under the bed, but it gave me an idea. Now what I needed was to find a roll of tape, but as you can probably tell, my apartment wasn't the most organized place in the world.

Some people have drawers in their office desk dedicated to pencils, pens, paper and even tape. In the first drawer of my computer desk, there was every piece of mail I had received since January of the previous year. My second drawer included items from every room in my apartment: scissors, butterknife, picture frame, roller mouse, old CD cases and even a pair of sandals. Why is there a pair of sandals in my computer desk you ask? It's the only place I can put them where they don't end up on my roommate's feet. The final drawer didn't contain any tape either but rather contained my favorite socks (same reason as the sandals) and a small mountain of notecards I use for school along with a box of band aids.

With twenty minutes left before my interview, I took every band aid in the box and connected them together around as much of the roller pin as I could with the adhesive on the outside. So I'm sitting in the middle of the living room, my shirt spread on the floor, rolling the pin over as much of the shirt as I could cover with the band aids. After a few minutes I checked my progress only to find patches of lint where the middle of the band aids had no adhesive. In walks my roommate and she suggests using a hairbrush. I had a better idea, why not use the vacuum?? The brushes move faster, can suck up the lint and will allow me to make my interview.

After convincing my roommate to hold the shirt on the floor I started the vacuum and exactly one second before I rolled over my shirt, my brain sent two messages. The first message was sent to my hand and arm to push the vacuum across my one and only dress shirt and another to the part of the brain responsible for common sense. Sadly, the first message was received before the second message. Needless to say, I didn't make it to my interview and now I'm looking for things in the house that will help me remove my shirt from the vacuum, because now I can't find a screwdriver.

James Junior is a freelance writer and web programmer.

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